Do you have FWS? Fatherless Woman Syndrome?

I ran across an amazing post online and needed to share some of it. You must read the entire post because the author breaks down so many of our culture’s issues rather nicely.

I feel this is a problem that needs immediate treatment. No drugs needed. Just love. Love between fathers and mothers…..and the slow demise of the family court system.

Fatherless Women Syndrome by Terrica Taylor (The Liberator Magazine 2.1 #4)
{image by Olukemi Kamson}

“Fatherless-ness” is an issue that needs to be discussed. Many times women don’t understand why they have the issues they do, but it’s only because they haven’t been able to put a name to their struggle. My philosophy is, “if you can name it you can change it.” The name is the Fatherless Women’s Syndrome; it’s a syndrome that affects many women….

….Within the Fatherless Women’s Syndrome, there are some very distinct symptoms that have an abnormal effect on our emotions. When a woman is left without her father, she has emptiness inside, she struggles with abandonment issues, and she may even feel unloved or unwanted. Some ladies without fathers in their lives may disagree with this diagnosis and may feel that their fathers’ absence has no affect or control over their lives but, even if it’s subconscious, it does have and affect and if we would be honest with ourselves, we would see that the syndrome shows its ugly head in all of our relationships….

…The question we should ask ourselves is why these relationships failed one after the other. Usually what happens with the woman who has Fatherless Women’s Syndrome is that she becomes either too clingy or too defensive and afraid of commitment….

…The woman who is too clingy holds on to a man for dear life in fear that he will reject her and leave her like the first man in her life—her dad. The man who she is clinging to perceives her as being too much of a responsibility, so he leaves….

…The woman who is afraid of commitment is very defensive and guards her heart—she doesn’t let herself get too close. This woman usually calls herself the “independent woman.” The title is something she believes will shield her from dealing with a greater reality, the reality of having the “syndrome.” She may believe that being in a relationship with a man is a sign of weakness—not realizing that it can be a sign of strength, because that mate is there to compliment the person she is. Men want nothing more then to feel wanted by their woman. It makes a man feel good to be our “knights in shining armor,” so if he feels unappreciated he will eventually get tired of it, and leave….

…In both instances, it leaves a woman in precisely the predicament she fears—alone….

…There is something about the father daughter relationship that is so special and unique; it’s where a woman recognizes her role and where she learns about a man’s role. This is why when a woman is left fatherless, something is lost; she doesn’t truly understand who she is as woman or the right things to look for when choosing a mate….

Read the entire post HERE